Help/Advice seriously.....?

Was in a 8 year relationship, have been seperated for a year now.In my mid-twenties and have a hard time finding a relationship/male companion.Don't really trust many,but I know I have to let my guard down and not all men are the same.Have a little boy and afraid to let any man near him because I don't want him to get attached and hurt,if the gentleman decides to stray...Help/Advice seriously.....?
What exactly is your question? Yes, you do have to let your guard down at least a little bit, but having a child changes the entire scheme of dating.





If you decide to date, keep your son out of it as long as possible. Don't let him talk to or meet the gentleman you are dating. Never take your son out on dates with you, never have dates at your house while your son is there. EVER!!!





Not until you and said gentleman have dated long enough, you've let your guard down enough, and he's proven he is going to stay...typically, don't let your son and the man meet until the man has proposed to you, and then let it be a semi-long engagement (about one year, so they can get to know each other).





This saves your child from getting attached to the man and the relationship not working out. It isn't healthy for young children especially to get attached to people who just keep leaving. And if you date more than one man before you find one to marry, think of how many men that will be walking out of your son's life that he will have gotten attached to.





For your son's sake, be very careful in how you date.Help/Advice seriously.....?
First Of All does your child understand whats going on? and what has happened with his dad?....once he does you can start dating and let him know that you need a man in your life but dont ever expect him to call tyhe new man ';dad'; and let him know that he isnt replacing the dad..
Getting hurt is a part of love, you shouldnt let this rule your future. As far as the child goes, just be honest w/ any man you might meet, and tell them about him up front. Kids can handle the man leaving easier than you can.
why dont you just cool of the relationship for a while..leave a fear on the side ..if a men loves you he is gonna stay with you regardless..enjoy life little you just got out of a long, long relationship...
All I can say is open your heart and have faith that the right man will come along.


It sounds like you already know that you're not going to find the companionship that you seek if you keep your guard up. Just keep an open mind and try some new things. Never lose confidence. You know what you have to give. And you're right to be concerned about your son. You should not have him meet your boy until you're confident in the way things are going and you've built some trust with the man.


There are always risks of your child getting attatched and then let down but when that happens you'll just have to explain to them what happened and help them cope. You'll still have eachother.


But when you do find the right guy it will be an amazing feeling. Good luck!
they are good men out there you can look at there past life and tell alot of what there like after knowing him for awhile like have they been in trouble by the law or has he been married twice and both relationships didnt last more than a year does he work and how long has he worked were does he work etc. you can ask questions and give a survey on a date with out him knowing do a little research on him with out him knowing your kid is worth it right
A lot of people, when they start dating again (and they have children), are very careful about having their dates meet their kids. It would probably be a good idea, that when you do meet somone, that you don't introduce him to your child for a few dates, until you feel that this person is sincere and trustworthy. Then introduce him slowly and as a friend, and just give things lots of time.
i would wait on letting your new male friend meet your son..i mean at least to u know if he's going to stay for sometime...and if he happens to ask why he has not met him just tell him the truth...and yeah he will tell u ';oh i'm going to stay'; but u just have to be honest and truthful to yourself first..and just tell him that u want to wait for a little while to see how thing's go...just be truthful about it that's all...
Maybe it's not the right time to be looking for a relationship right now. You care about your son a lot, so it's great that you're thinking about his feelings too.





If you do decide to date, consider dropping off your son at a babysitter's or with some relatives. Let the man in question know that you have a son, but don't introduce him until it gets more serious.





Good luck!
I say don't look for someone, not until you are ready to move on. If you do meet someone who you are interested in, be up front and honest with him. That is the best that you can do.